Randomness

... which explains my thought process much of the time. While it is possible for me to concentrate on the task at hand, (or in the case of my latest hobby project, building Revell's immense and impressive U.S.S. Constitution, the task is bits and pieces that mysteriously vanish when I need them, more on that later), quite often I find my mind drawn off in tangents. I've always had a vivid imagination, and many times wanted to either daydream of engage in some activity such as writing, painting, or model building rather than what I was doing at the time. Since the task interfering with what I really wanted to be doing was usually work or school, my flights of fantasy were hardly practical.

When I was working evenings and weekends were looked forward to with great enthusiasm as it meant the time and freedom to pursue more creative ventures. Now that I'm retired, I view each day with the same enthusiasm. Yet even now there is a balancing act. After the first month, I started feeling an emptiness, that I had outlived my usefulness in some capacities. When I was at EPA, I was a database administrator and ran the show. I had national recognition, respect, and truly enjoyed my work.

Once that was gone, I felt adrift in some ways, as my career was something I had built on my own, and it gave me a badly needed focus. Fortunately, I've found new activities, one of which is a continuation of my career, to fill that void. I started my own company to contract out my data management services, and just a week ago signed my first contract. It's a good feeling to be continuing the work I liked, and of course getting paid for it is also good motivation! I'm also taking a class in 3D modeling at Lonestar College in town. I love computer graphics, and while I can manipulate preset models to my liking, I've always been interested in creating my own from scratch.

So far the results are not exactly world beaters, but I'm learning the basic concepts and will be able to pick up more and more with experience. The only down side is the software I'm learning on, Autodesk's 3DStudio Max is very capable, but if I want my own copy it will cost four thousand big ones. I'm looking for cheaper alternatives naturally.

I also got back into model building. I had built several wood model ships when I was back in California, but didn't have the space to build or display any aircraft or anything else. So now that I have that room, I've gotten back into what unfortunately is a shrinking hobby. Too few youngsters these days have the patience or desire to build anything. But I still enjoy it. One of my prize possessions from the past was the Constitution. My Dad built one years ago and thoroughly enjoyed the challenge. I yearned to try it myself, then finally got up the courage to try. It was frustrating at times as the kit has a multitude of tiny parts, plus being plastic it was fragile. Plus it is easy to warp the masts when rigging.

But it was a great lesson in concentration and perseverence. I kept my random thoughts while working on it to fantasies of leading it into battle. Alas, I ended up leaving it behind when I moved out of my townhouse in Fremont, and I can take for granted it did not last long afterwards. So shortly after moving to Texas I mail ordered a new one, and relived the pleasures, and patience trying frustrations, of building it again. And it is turning out rather well. It'll never win any competitions, but I'm satisfied with it. The only sad part is wishing I could once again call my Dad to share our experiences in building it.

After it's finished, I'll take a break from ships to tackle some airplane projects. Of course I'll have to discipline myself to do this at an appropriate time, while working on a paying customer's project is not a good idea if I plan on staying in business.

But there is one other item I must add, the most important part of my life, the constant encouragement, stimulation, and love from my precious wife.